I am back at wanting to be perfect again. Trying to do a really good job can be
exhausting. I am noticing that I rip the head off of my partner whenever he points out that
I am not, in fact, perfect. I wonder if a desire to be perfect it is some kind of ego high.
Like, my ego enjoys being good at something to such a strong amount that I am terrified
that if I am not good at the things that I find pride in then I am not good for anything.
What if life was a grand machine at that by simply breathing I was able to run the motor.
Then my only job would be to breath. Then all that other stuff that I think is important
and I think defines me would not matter.
Mantra: I am a cog in the breath machine and I am doing my job and that is good enough.
exhausting. I am noticing that I rip the head off of my partner whenever he points out that
I am not, in fact, perfect. I wonder if a desire to be perfect it is some kind of ego high.
Like, my ego enjoys being good at something to such a strong amount that I am terrified
that if I am not good at the things that I find pride in then I am not good for anything.
What if life was a grand machine at that by simply breathing I was able to run the motor.
Then my only job would be to breath. Then all that other stuff that I think is important
and I think defines me would not matter.
Mantra: I am a cog in the breath machine and I am doing my job and that is good enough.
You may be forgetting that you already are perfect and you just need to let go of any attachment to the idea that you're not.
ReplyDeleteHelen